photo by Bruce-Michael Gelbert
Hedda Lettuce serenades Jerad Bortz
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“Queen of Green” Hedda Lettuce made her seasonal return to Cherry’s, where she performs on Sundays and Tuesday nights, on May 31. Tom Branigan served as DJ.
Hedda teased Gusty Winds about her weight loss, saying she was going to turn into a Pines Queen and come to think that “the ferry is just for you!” She dished Ginger Snap, Busted, the boys who “fool around in the Jacuzzi,” and most everybody else. She discussed the Grove Hotel’s style of “renovation” and claimed that Cherry’s is housing her there, in a room, “with three walls.”
Hedda dedicated her version of “As If We Never Said Goodbye,” from “Sunset Boulevard,” to Cherry Grove, with references to the Pines, Porsche, Busted, and Tea Dance. She sang “The Dunes are alive with the sound of bottoms,” to the tune of the title song from “Sound of Music” (“I go to the Rack when my hole gets lonely”).
Our diva sang “Happy Birthday” to Jerad Bortz, from the cast of “Wicked,” for a $120 tip, and dedicated “Jesus, Take the Wheel (’cause I’m too drunk to drive),” part of it as a sing-along, to our birthday celebrant. Another audience participation number was “Private Dancer,” Hedda’s tipping song. Her penultimate number was a pairing of “All That Jazz,” from “Chicago,” as “All that Jizz,” and “Be Our Guest,” from “Beauty and the Beast,” as “On My Chest,” and she ended with an understated dance, which she closed by singing, “Fuck me, Baby!”
Hedda Lettuce will perform, under the auspices of the Arts Project of Cherry Grove, at the Community House, on August 8, in a show entitled “Big Queen, Small Throne,” singing, with her pianist, all songs that she wrote herself.